Fall is my favorite time of year. Not only because of chilly mornings, warm afternoons, wood-burning stove, soup, and the changing of colors (just to name a few), but also because it’s a cue to the closing of another year. OK, and it’s also a sign that my birthday is fast approaching. Another year in the books.
One of the best things about growing up, well, getting older, is that we get to start making our own decisions. I realized in college that I had been ordering my eggs and steak the same way my parents had. Can you imagine, after 20-odd years that I finally recognized I hate eggs over-medium? It was unreal. And just for the record, I now like peas, brussel sprouts, and burnt popcorn. I can blame the late pea discovery on my dad and sister, and I’m sure there are very few kids who request a brussel sprout trial. Either way, these are just a few sound decisions I have made in my older years.
On a more serious note, we get to decide how we find and create ourselves. How does this even happen? I think it happens largely in how we spend our time and with who. Sometimes as children, we were forced to be around other kids that we didn’t really like. Maybe those kids were mean to us or to others, or maybe they caused us to get into trouble. Well, we’re still on a playground, except now it’s the whole world within the fence line.
Under no circumstance are you forced to keep people around that don’t help you be the best version of yourself that you can be. Are you surrounding yourself with people that leave you depleted and exhausted? If the answer is yes, then it might be time to ask for the check. These friendships/relationships are important, however, because they make us realize (hopefully) what is happening to our own self-value. Once we value ourselves, we choose others to be in our lives that increase the value and get rid of those who lessen it.
Everyone who walks into our lives has a purpose, but it’s up to us if they unpack their bag or simply pass through. If you’ve invited someone to unpack but you realize they’ve overstayed their welcome, it’s never too late to change your mind. Every decision at this point is in your possession. First, decide to place the highest value on yourself and what you have to offer the world. You’re a gem, and what you say, feel, think, do, and represent is a privilege for those around you. Choose wisely, for those who you spend the most time with are a reflection; they should feel honored.