Just a few thoughts…

Archive for the month “August, 2012”

Precious Cargo

I consider myself extremely lucky, and I probably don’t thank God enough for what and who he has blessed me with. There’s not very many people in the world who can count on both hands the people that would drop anything if needed, and I am one of those lucky ones. More importantly, the people closest to me are continuously teaching me something, and we are learning together. A topic that comes up quite often is that of physical appearance: weight, fitness, beauty, etc. The normalcy of this topic in everyday conversation is not what dawned on me, but the misplace of value at hand. The value is in the wrong spot.

My sister and I were recently in a daily chat, and “the scale” came up. It comes up quite often. She, among millions of other humans in the world, is a Scale Stepper. She gets on that thing everyday (errday). The problem is not that she is watching her weight, which is actually a very mindful activity for staying healthy. The problem is that one little number on the screen can determine her mood for whole day. Let’s explore this possible catastrophe.

Whether is conditioning, habit, media, society, or just control, there is an extremely high level of value placed on the number that people see on the scale. Obviously we face an obesity epidemic, which is not to be confused with this conversation. But even so, for those that are struggling with weight, it does not reflect the person that you are.  I’m talking about the value we place on tangible, material, superficial and unimportant facts that we let define us as people.

Unfortunately, most people do not value themselves. What’s even more unfortunate is how we usually are dishing out amazing advice to others about loving, befriending, and caring for themselves when we need to take the advice ourselves. If we valued ourselves as much as we value our most important people, then we wouldn’t fall into these viscous cycles of self-torment, self-loathing, and misplaced value, which just leads us into negative behavior.

Make it a priority to find value in who you are, not what you are. The type of friend you are, the special and unique talents that you have, the partner, parent, employee, and citizen all trump what you’re wearing and/or what you look like. Here’s a challenge: be nice to yourself! Don’t say anything to yourself that you wouldn’t say to your best friend or sibling. Don’t allow yourself to beat your own self up over something that has nothing to do with how God made you. If you’re not happy with something, then allow yourself time to change it. Place value on yourself. 

How do you value yourself? How do you value the person that you are? More so, what do you focus on to define you? Think about it or write some things down that you value in life and in yourself. Don’t let shallow, empty valued variables steer your actions and self-worth. You’re more than that. You’re precious cargo.



Humans hate change; whether it’s coin change or life change, we avoid it by nature. Quarters are legit, but we’d probably break a dollar before we took the time to fish for coins. The irony of this fact is that change is the only constant in life. Nothing is permanent but change.

It’s easy to get lost in the routine. Maybe you’re having the time of your life and you never want the experience to end. Or maybe it’s the worst time of your life, and you can’t imagine how you’re going to get out of the misery. I’ve had both-I have both.

What do you need? Is it the same thing you needed before? Have you changed possibly? It’s OK to have liked your job for a while, but now you want a new challenge. If we are constantly changing as people with what we want, need, desire, crave, then it’s only natural for relationships to possibly do that too. You owe it to yourself to ask YOU first what you’re needing. Take inventory of what’s going on inside…and be welcome to what you hear.

Relationships never end, but simply change. This is a biggy for me because it’s hard to not have my dad physically here for me to see. He’ll always be my dad, and I’ll always be able to talk to him, but it’s a hard concept to grasp that spiritually we’re in two different places right now. Our relationship wasn’t cut off when he passed away, its dynamics have just changed. Have you ever gone to pick up the phone to call someone and realized that they won’t be on the other end? It’s huge! This goes for past relationships, too. Even though you’re “ex’s,” your relationship has been established; even though you may not see or speak to your ex, that’s the current status of your relationship. It’s how we grow and change as people to move forward from what we may not need anymore. Don’t hang on to something or someone because you’re afraid of losing the feeling, or the person, or the connection. It will be there forever, just maybe showing itself differently.

If we look at life on a continuum of highs and lows, and constant change, then we won’t feel stuck or worried that this, right now, is forever. This too shall pass…even the best of times are bound the end-but they will come back again.

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